What's a Shmuck?
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A shmuck is a party for calming all your nerves…oh, wait…wrong explanation.
In Yiddish, a shmuck is a penis. For our extension of the term, a shmuck is basically like god; just a slob like one of us. Whatever you believe in – whatever’s your jam – there’s no denying that all of us – ALL of us – have no clue what we’re doing here. If you believe in the universe, you have no idea why you’re sittin’ and spinnin’ on a planet hurling itself into nothingness. If you believe in a divinity that has a plan for you, you have no clue what that plan entails. In fact, when we wake up, day-after-day, we’re basically winging existence. It’s not a bad thing, it’s what makes you, you: a shmuck. So this website is dedicated to all the shmucky things we do when we are trying to be nice, when we are trying to find love, when we are trying to be important, or special, or worthy. The point being, don’t take the game of life so seriously; you get to think you’ve won because you’ll never know the difference.
About This Shmuck:
Hailing from the rehab and retirement capital of America, located on the head of the penis itself – South Florida – I received my Bachelor of Arts degree in Communications: Film, Video, and New Media from Florida Atlantic University. I was never a big beach person - I hate the sunshine and heat – so the most logical place for me to move after graduation was Los Angeles. No, I didn’t move for change of climate; I moved because my head was full of the naïve notion that Hollywood was the magical place in which dreams are made and careers are born. I quickly learned that I bought the dream they sold me, and it was overpriced. I’m not good at walking around pretending to be something I’m not, so I decided to sink even lower in debt and apply for graduate school. Of course, my parents advocated for such a move, and I needed fulfillment. I gained acceptance into the hallowed gate of Northwestern University in Chicago. Finally, I was living in perfect weather of cool air, rain, clouds, and snow! After two years, I achieved my MFA in Writing for the Screen and Stage. Armed with confidence and growth, I came back to Los Angeles only to realize that I’m getting sucked in once again. This time, I’m a little older, a little less naïve, and I got nothing else to do. Hmm…I’ve always wanted the title of Doctor.
My name is Jacob Cullen. I’m a writer, and a shmuck…just like you.